I was told “I don’t want you” by someone that means the world to me. I’d proven that I’d do anything within my power for this individual but my best wasn’t good enough.

The words ripped through my heart like paper in a shredder. In that moment I wasn’t angry, I didn’t think of mean spirited things to say in retaliation, I simply replayed the words in my mind until I was numb.

Never did I have regrets for the person I was, and honestly I’d play the same role if the scene played out again. Having said that, the feeling of not being wanted caused me to temporarily question my worth. In trying to find out why, I found that the reason didn’t matter. The result was clearly stated and I needed to be ok with it.

How does one be ok with not being wanted? One comes to peace with the reality that sometimes there is nothing we can do to make others value our presence. We don’t discount our worth, we don’t downplay our purpose, and we damn sure don’t stay for the purpose of being present.

What we do is process our feelings so they don’t consume us. We cry if we need to, we write if it helps, we call a confidant and confess the good / bad / and ugly – we keep living.

Today’s I don’t want you can become tomorrow’s I’ve been waiting for you, but you can’t give up on yourself.