All too often I’m presented with a question that I absolutely loathe. I doubt if the inquisitive individual has taken time to place value on the sensitivity of the issue; however, it ever so easily rolls off their lips…

Why don’t you have children?

In my mind I scream out: BECAUSE I DON’T WANT CHILDREN, I’VE NEVER WANTED CHILDREN – but in real time I simply reply it wasn’t in God’s plan for me.

Most people will say I’m sorry, as if my not having children is a worse case situation and they sympathize with me, while others fire off more questions on a quest to figure out what’s wrong.

Why is my choice not to have children a sign of a bad reproductive system, and if that is the case why is there an expectation of me to openly discuss my inability?

Why can’t my choice be just that, a choice – and why am I not entitled to that decision? Every little girl doesn’t like baby dolls and dresses and every woman doesn’t yearn for the joys of pregnancy. I’m that woman!

My not wanting the responsibility of mothering isn’t an opening for judgement to seep through; however, the role I play as Ms. Lisa is – allow me to introduce you to her…….

She is the one that supports the neighborhood children when they are selling candy. She’s the one that makes being there for the children of her friends and family a priority. She’s the contributor to fundraisers in support of youth athletic teams and the voice of encouragement along their journey. She’s the one that will send you a message if she sees your child engaged in wrongdoing but also the one that will bring back praises when they are due. She is the one they can talk to when you’re not approachable, with a warning that if the issue requires parental knowledge I’m going to tell.

She’s not a mother of any by way of labor and delivery but a mother to many by way of love and support.

I am she – Feel free to judge me on that!